East Coast Gazette

I have the unfortunate pleasure of working the 6:30 p.m. to 12:30 a.m. tonight (YEEEEAH NEWSMEDIA!) so my roommates and I had our 4th of July cookout yesterday, complete with buffalo burgers (delicious but needs more fat to stay juicier) potato, onion, and bell pepper hash and lemon drops and a metric ton of Rainier beer — which is just as disgusting as it sounds.

Of course, what makes today even more special — aside from the preemptive post-drinking lag — is that Bravo is running an all-day Project Runway season three marathon, with my favorite shenanigans ever: there’s nothing quite so beautiful as Laura and Michael’s friendship, Keith’s bitchiness, Kayne and Robert’s bff disco ball pageant dress slash Barbie doll Miss America dress. It’s all wonderfulness times a bajillion. You know what else is wonderfulness times a bajillion? The fact that Bravo has put up (rejected) audition tapes from season four on their BrilliantButCanceled.com site — you know you’re all about it, don’t lie. (Try and see if you can guess which of these geniuses is my favorite.)

But you know what’s even more important than that? (I know, it’s hard to imagine!)

I HAVEN’T DONE A HORRIBLE ARTDUMP ON YA’LL IN A WHILE.

Pikachu — appropriately — bitchslaps me for my oversight. (more…)

Title:It doesn’t mean you can explain the ocean
Rating: R
Summary: They don’t have names anymore, these gods who speak.

The story was completed…ages ago, but was never in a single collected part until now — courtesy of Shalott, who took initiative and coded the page. I’m not joking. God knows how long this story might have languished otherwise. Because I’m a rockstar. Anyway — happy reading. Especially for people who like their pain in one place.

Title: Eat Your Heart Out
Rating: PG
Summary: On Wednesday, Doumeki had a bento box with flowers on it.

Title: Renegotiation
Rating: R
Summary: renegotiation, verb [trans]: negotiate (something) in order to change the original agreed terms.

Title: Telephone
Rating: PG-13
Summary: It’s tough being Team 7.

Title: Eat Your Heart Out
Rating: PG
Summary: On Wednesday, Doumeki had a bento box with flowers on it.

I literally and actually probably gained weight in the process of writing this damn thing. For the record, constantly describing food is a good way to get yourself awake at 2 a.m. rummaging around your kitchen to make a sandwich or possibly a pot of bolognaise sauce or maybe a pie. I’m just saying in theory. You know. But no, this is Hoyden’s fault, since this story was written by and almost entirely TO her, in a gtalk window — ah technology.

Happy reading!